Flash: What are they really trying to sell?

Image from freedigitalphotos.net

“Telly off.”

“Hey, I was watching that.” Karter complained to his mother.

She picked up two dishes, then stacked a third between them, showing off her skills as a human waitress. “And I told you, no screen time until your studies are done for the day.”

“I got it done, mostly. And what I didn’t finish isn’t important.” He flopped over on the floor to look up at her. “Consumer awareness is complete yesteryear.”

His mom’s eyes twitched, and her lips formed a flat line. “Fine, then tell me why that commercial, selling a car I couldn’t afford on two years hustling tables, and certainly not something you can buy at your age, showed up in your feed?”

“Um … because it is cool?” Sitting up, the fourteen-year-old looked around the room for clues. “Maybe related to a new three-dee-show?”

“That is a start. The HyundaiHondaHover is used a lot in Fifteen Rings over Cylan, but reverse the logic.” The adult lifted the plates. “I’m drop these into the cube and set dinner heating, but I expect a better answer by the time I get back or you will be on screen blackout tomorrow.”

“Aw mom, no, tomorrow is MechBattle.”

“Karter, this is important to me, and I believe it will be important to you in the future. Use that implant and gray matter to come up with something.” She stopped in the threshold and looked back. “I’m not being unreasonable. I know that is what you are thinking. But remember, I’m your mom. I’m always on your side even when it doesn’t feel like it. The sellers, with those commercials and ads, are not. Know who is your opposition and who is your support system.”

He rolled his eyes but activated the EdYou screen.

***

Karter made his way to the kitchen after the dinner ding came through. He discovered the reason why his mom hadn’t came back immediately was she had been folding laundry. Tucking his head down, he sat at the table. That folding and delivery chore should have been completed by him two days ago.

The near-beef stew with a side of real bread from her work smelled delicious. Automatically he reached for her hand across the small table.

“We remember to be grateful in the small things for they build the best parts of our lives. We remember to be grateful in the small acts for they build the best friendships of our lives. We remember to be grateful for the small ideas for they build the best principles of our lives. Confirm.”

“Confirm.” Karter solemnly closed the grace. Dropping his mom’s hand, he dug into his fourth calorie allotment of the day.

She let him eat about half before asking, “Do you have the report ready?”

“Hm, maybe. Obviously if it is an officially registered commercial, they are either advertising, selling a product or service, or marketing, selling a concept or reputation. Since we aren’t in the position to buy, under proper targeting for advertising, I shouldn’t have seen the flying car commercial.” He tore two more pieces of bread off his slice and dropped them into the soup and stirred it. “So the question is, what are they marketing?”

“And you had speculated maybe a movie or telly show.”

“But that isn’t right, because product placement would be doing the reverse, unless it is selling nostalgia like using old cars in shows.” He scrunched his nose. “Since the HyundaiHondaHover is a newer line, only two years old according to the implant download, and they are pushing next month’s model, the new show is selling the car, not the car selling the show. Like you said, reverse the logic.”

“You do listen to me sometimes. Good to know.” His mom smirk turned into a smile. “I appreciate your thinking so far. But you haven’t answered why are they dropping a commercial for a private car into the feed of a family only able to afford public transportation, and not even the special services like individual taxi and flame jumps, only the mass transport.”

“Well, if it isn’t advertising, it has to be marketing.” Karter used the last of his bread to empty the bowl, then jammed it in his mouth before he continued talking. “I don’t think it is the concept. We are aware of the flying cars using the flame streams to triple their speed. I’m sure they want to drop that in every now and again, so if we ever get insta-rich, we want to pick up one immediately. But the HyundaiHondaHover ads came on three times today, and there were another couple for the MercedesCadallicWind. I could see one or two every few days, but five in one day is a lot to aim at someone my age.”

“Just how long were you on screen today?”

“Um, do you want me to answer that or finish the report?” Karter asked hopefully.

His mom pinched the bridge of her nose. “Finish the report.”

“Since it isn’t a concept, it has to be reputation.” He pushed his bowl to the center of the table frowning. “They want us to WANT flying cars even when we can’t afford them. They want us to desire things beyond our ability, to make them more valuable to people who can afford them because other people can’t. Make some people feel better when other people are hungering after the idea they have access to, the small ideas. But this twists the small ideas, corrupting people’s principles with envy, instead of the pillars of support, growth, and beauty.” Karter looked at his mom. “That is some premium grade therapy-need.”

“Yes, and they also take it further.” His mother stacked her bowl into his and stood up from the table, moving the dishes over to the washer cube for loading. “They will sell you models of the cars, clothing with the design, and posters for the walls, all to keep you aware of what you want but can’t have, and have you pay for the privilege because they own the idea and image. But, you know, Consumer Awareness is a boring, unimportant subject. It’s okay to blow it off and support the mega-corps products.”

“Mom, I haven’t been dipping on the psychology classes; reverse-pysch is complete yesteryear.”

“I accept correction.” Having finished loading and activating the washing cube, his mom leaned against the counter. “But I do have one last inquiry before you put away the laundry.”

Karter rolled his eyes and groaned.

“Are you going to continue to dip on the Consumer Awareness?”

“Do you think that they will continue to hit me up to ride the envy flame?”

“They hit you five times today.” She shook her head in annoyance. “No screen time tomorrow until ALL your studies are done. But, let me tell you as someone with a few more years living the marketing stream, they hope you don’t bother with your studies, and if you do, they hope that they can wear you down with a constant stream. They want you to want a flying car really badly. And other stuff like it.”

Karter glanced around their small eating room before he said, “I would like a flying car.”

“So would I.”

(words 1,206; first published 12/10/2023)

Book Review: You Sexy Thing

Amazon Cover

You Sexy Thing by Cat Rambo

BOOK BLURB ON AMAZON

Just when they thought they were out…

TwiceFar station is at the edge of the known universe, and that’s just how Niko Larson, former Admiral in the Grand Military of the Hive Mind, likes it.

Retired and finally free of the continual war of conquest, Niko and the remnants of her former unit are content to spend the rest of their days working at the restaurant they built together, The Last Chance.

But, some wars can’t ever be escaped, and unlike the Hive Mind, some enemies aren’t content to let old soldiers go. Niko and her crew are forced onto a sentient ship convinced that it is being stolen and must survive the machinations of a sadistic pirate king if they even hope to keep the dream of The Last Chance alive.

 

MY REVIEW

You Sexy Thing is a fun sci-fi read. Want aliens? Got aliens of all kinds. Want space stations? Yep, got that too. Want space pirates? Sure-in-dippity-do. Wide-ranging space politics? Got that. Military sci-fi? A bit of that too.

Food. Space food – so much cooking. Takes it a level beyond normal space opera and makes a unique world of space critics and teaching AI ships steps beyond replicator food. All while giving you aliens, space stations, pirates, politics, and military in space expected of the genre.

Basically think a hamburger, but presented with the perfect bun, lettuce, a side of pickle, and, oh, a delightful hot fudge sundae to end the meal. Everything you want – up a level in presentation.

Flash: Friendzone Boss Battle

Photo by Pylz Works on Unsplash

Something a friend posted on Facebook:

“What men don’t realize is they aren’t ‘sentenced to the friend zone’, no, they allowed into the friendzone and given the first step of a quest. Women want to know if you can be friends, then we’ll talk about what else may or may not be added to the relationship.

Because if we can’t be friends, there isn’t a relationship.”

The following flash continues the “conversation.” Assume Shayda said the above.

“Yeah, noobs think they can just jump to Big Boss level 100 immediately.” Joanne snorted. “Amateurs.”

Shayda lay on her stomach between her friends, one on a recliner and the other hogging the coach as only a seven-month pregnant woman could. She grabbed another fistful of popcorn from the bowl between the two pieces of furniture, before asking, “So what would be your Big Boss fight on your quest?”

Rubbing her stomach, Joanne replied, “Oh, I don’t know, getting past my daddy issues?”

Carefully not looking up at the one in the recliner, Shayda asked, “You?”

“Hmm, sticking around through a crisis, I guess?” Patty shrugged, feet curled up in the overstuffed chair. “Never had anyone do that but you guys. The boyfriends always want to solve it and be done. Mack was the best of the lot and he couldn’t handle the long-term COVID fatigue that took a year to clear up. No stamina.”

Both of the other women nodded, with Shayda adding. “True dat.”

“How about you, Shay?” Joanne placing a small bowl beside the coach to be refilled. Shayda reached for it.

Patty rocked forward to look down, “Yeah, Shay, how about you?”

“Well, that stamina thing is huge.” After carefully doling out the next serving of buttery crunch for the land-whale and passing it up to Joanne, Shayda responded, “I guess that is part of the guys wanting to jump right through the friend zone to the boyfriend zone. No one wants to spend three months being friends with no ‘reward’.”

“Except they are willing to do three months on a game to get to level 100, so not buying that,” said the youngest member of the MMOG Thursday group.

“And friendship is its own reward. … Being around all of this is a pretty awesome thing, you know.” Joanne waved her expansive body, “And you are getting us off topic, Shay.”

Patty asked quietly, “What is your big boss?”

“Listening, I guess.” Shayda levered herself up to look at her two friends, leaning against the low center table. “Caring, supporting. Being a friend.”

“Yeah, if someone is in my house day-in day-out, I would want that.” Patty said in a wistful tone.

“Help with laundry, mowing, all the chores.” Shayda started ticking off requirements on her fingers. “Does me no good if you are more work than being on my own. Especially, if you want kids.”

Joanne twisted her lips, rubbing her stretched red-lined skin where her too tight shirt had slid up, and grunted, managing to sit vertical in one try, and set aside the re-emptied bowl.

“So a partner.” Patty wrapped her arms around her legs.

“Exactly,” the black woman nodded, “An equal.”

The group sighed at the concept.

“Yeah, that would be nice,” Joanne agreed.

The three gave little smiles to each other.

Then Shayda’s took a manic curve. “Plus explosive sex!”

(words 544; first published 11/29/2023; written 5/12/2023)

Flash: Split Checks

Photo by Raphael Renter on Unsplash

“Splitting Image?” I said as I stepped out of my car, looking at the mirror-image neon sign above the restaurant entrance.

Katie smiled at me, making my heart skip a beat, half in fear and half in hope. “You said you wanted to go outside the normal. The place is owned by identical twin sisters and they hire twins and look-similar siblings whenever possible.”

I rubbed my left arm with my right hand after shouldering my purse. “Sounds interesting.”

“Great food and some cool twists on its theme.” She strode across the aisle of the parking lot filled with small cars and minivans with me in her wake. Katie arrived at the entrance first and opened the door for me. I ducked my head and smiled thanks, still unsure about all the protocols.“You’ll love it.”

We’ve eaten enough together as co-workers when the gang of us decompressed after work, she knew my tastes, so I trusted her about that. The inside of the restaurant had a series of columns down the center, and everything mirrored across except the seated patrons. Green carpet, matching booths and tables, light fixtures. The back wall, behind the low partition hiding the server drink station, was an engraved mirror of three swans, two larger ones and one baby, either side of the final column in the room swimming toward each other, with reflections in the rippling water beneath.

The hostess led us to a booth matching an already seated booth with two people on the other side, bringing the patrons back into balance and making me chuckle. Accepting the menu, I asked the woman a burning question, “What happens when parties don’t match?”

Katie facepalmed, but a laugh escaped her as well.

“Well, we seat a new party in the area of their choice,” the woman handed Katie her menu after my date took her hand away from her face, “and if the incoming party doesn’t want to sit at the next appropriate table, well, we make them wait.”

“No,” Katie said surprised, “really?”

“Absolutely, you eat here, you play by my rules.” The woman nodded to the menus. “What would you like to drink?”

“Water for me.” I said.

“Draft beer for me.” Katie picked the plastic holder tucked against the wall and pointed at her favorite on the alcohol list. “I’m not driving.” She looked across at me. “Let me tell you, I’m really liking that.”

“Well, um,” I blushed, stammering. “You’re paying, it’s only fair.”

“I make more,” my younger co-worker stated firmly. “And I asked you out.”

I nod. “Yes, thanks.”

“Do you know what you want to eat, ladies?” our hostess asked.

Katie jumped in, being familiar with the menu. “I’ll have the Apollo Sunshine side salad, hold the peanuts but add extra cranberries if possible.”

“Not a problem.”

“And for the entrée, I’ll have Esau’s wild game stew, split serving.”

“Paper or plastic?”

“The plastic please, the stew doesn’t work well in the paper.”

The hostess grimaced. “Yeah, we are still working finding the right products at reasonable prices for everything.”

“What is the difference between twin and split serving? They have the same price.” I ask, struggling with the unusual size listings on the menu.

“Onsie is an appropriate meal size according to the normal calories an adult male needs each day.” The hostess said. “Twin and split serving are the size serving most Americans expect to get, which is about three times what a person needs, especially a female. Twin brings it out all at once, while split puts half into a bag for you to take home. We deliver the split to you at the end of your meal. Double the meals, double the fun.”

“That sounds … smart.” I glance at my date. “I guess I should order a single, um, onsie.”

“Don’t you dare, girlfriend!” Katie explained. “The food is totally worth a couple days. Half the dishes are even better as leftovers.”

“But, I mean…”

My co-worker narrowed her eyes at me.

“um… what is a good dish?” my voice raised high at the end of the question, more asking if the question would get me out of the dog house than asking the question.

Katie smiled and nodded approval.

“We serve sandwiches, stews, salads, and steaks of various meats.” The hostess gestured at the menu. “If you flip it over, you can find out pasta and seafood list that is available on weekends. Our chalkboard has today’s specials; my personal favorite is the Artemis. Now, if you excuse me, I’ll get your drinks in while you think.” She walked back to the main station, where a party of four just came in.

The Artemis wasn’t on the menu, but I always liked the moon twin as the Virgin protector, so I tilted my head toward the chalkboard and Katie quickly got out of her side of the booth and offered a hand to help me stand. At fifty, my knees have started protesting my long life. I can walk fine and sit fine, but the transition the two states raised protests.

“Thank you.” I said to the thirty-four year old, wondering again why she even was interested in me. A hot shot at work, she already soared beyond me, though not in my management structure, thank the universe for small blessings. Me, I’ve always done well, meeting all requirements, but soaring wasn’t my thing. I like my little world of accounting and human resources, keeping everything moving smoothly for our coworkers.

Her hand remained on my elbow as she guided me to the chalkboard. While the Artemis looked tasty with the choice of game and greens with a moon pie finish, the Pepper & Salt ended up being my choice. I let the hostess know before we made our way back to our table.

“That’s the owner, or one of them, right?” I asked as we sat.

“Yes, the other is the weekday cook.” Katie unwrapped her napkin and utensils. “Denise is the seafood cook and takes over the back on weekends, leaving Deborah in the front. You can tell the difference because Debbie loves to chalk her hair when she isn’t cooking.”

“However did you find this place? It’s new, right?” Oh dear, I dropped into interview mode. Shake it off before I ‘right’ myself out the door.

“They’ve been open for about three months.” Katie leaned back as one of the waitresses set her beer on the table, then my water. The waitress’ twin delivered food to the couple who arrived before us. “I hate cooking for myself. So I’m always trying to find good places. The split option makes this the perfect place.”

“So long as you remember to eat the leftovers.” I added a teasing lilt to my tone, having seen the carnage Katie and the other coworkers leave in the breakroom’s refrigerator beside my carefully labeled bag lunch.

“There is that,” she smirked at me. “But so far, not a single one of these leftovers hit the round bin. They are too good to miss.”

“Now that is a testament.” I responded. “Last time I cleaned out the fridge, you won the most abandoned meals with six.”

“Oh god,” Katie laughed loud enough people turned their heads toward us, making me scoot down a little. “You actually counted?”

I nodded small and whispered, “of course.”

“Of course.” Katie reached across the table to grab my twisting hands. “Of course,” she said softer. “You are amazing. You know that, right?”

I look at our joined hands and shook my head a little side to side.

“Well, you are. Beautiful, bright and amazing.” Katie squeezed my hands before releasing them. “So together about everything, I stand in awe. I mean, I’ve never been in a cleaner car in my life.”

A sound similar to a laugh escaped me as I sat a little higher. “Thank you?”

“No really. The way you decorate the entrance for every holiday. The way you reach out for birthdays and anniversaries.” Katie’s hands started waving, indicating our main office, the little cards I made sure everyone got. “You hold the office together.”

“It’s my job.” I shrug. “It’s what HR does.”

She shook her head firmly. “Not in my experience, and I worked a lot of places before I landed here. You are really good at your job.”

“Thank you.” I ducked my chin down.

Katie paused, her face getting serious under her blond “Karen” bob. “Are you uncomfortable?”

“No.” I rock my head a little. “I … the temperature is fine.”

“No, no.” Katie inhaled, before waving her hand around and explaining. “With this, the date.”

“Oh, no.” The words rushed out. “I’m fine with the date.”

“You seem uncomfortable, and I know you don’t date much.”

“I don’t date at all, not since I got divorced.” I scrunch my nose. “I’m not sure I dated before then. What…” I knock off the count in my head. “three dates in my life, counting this one. Patrick took me to the prom and he took me out the night he asked to marry me.”

“You’re fucking kidding me.” My date’s brown eyes grew round. “He never took you anywhere?”

“No, we are … were, he died two years ago, both homebodies.” I move my silverware to one side as I see our waitress approach.

“But you are okay with this.” Katie waved her hand back and forth between us. “Dating a woman? Dating me?”

“I guess … no, let me state that more clearly.” I smiled bright at her, but paused until the waitress put Katie’s salad in front of her and my sweet-and-sour soup in front of me and returned us to our privacy. “I am very, very happy you asked me out. I never would have had the guts, and you are amazing.”

“The lesbian thing is okay?”

I laugh, stirring the soup to cool it down, letting my eyes fall to it. “Yeah. I’ve always … well, I think … I like women.”

“More than men?” she pressed, spearing an orange slice.

“Oh definitely. So much more than men.” My smile grew crooked. “But, you know, that isn’t expected, and I…” my voice lowered and took a bitter edge, “I do what is expected. I didn’t want to disappoint my parents.”

“Hard-line Christians?”

“Yes. But even more than that,” I try the soup. The sour made my mouth pucker before the sweet teased the edges. “Dad had expectations.”

“Parents always do.” Katie moved the remains of her salad into a smaller pile, the cranberries gleaming in the twin-berry vinaigrette. “Are they going to have a problem if we become friends?”

I sighed. “No, Dad died five years ago and Mom passed before him. It’s why I could get a divorce.”

“Oh.” Katie concentrated on shoveling in the last bits while I had my soup.

Finally, I couldn’t take the silence. “I’m just not as brave as you.”

Katie negated the statement with a wave of her hand. “I have two older brothers who are giving my parents lots of grandkids, and I’m the beloved baby. They breathed a sigh of relief when I officially came out, as I stopped all the teenage angst bullshit once I knew I had my family support. You can take on the world when you got a loving, understanding family at your back.”

I laughed softly. “Would have been nice.”

“Yeah, it is.” Katie nodded. “The fact you are willing to risk it. To break your habits. Wow.”

I pushed the half-finished soup away. I picked up my napkin and pressed it gently against my lips, checking to make sure I didn’t rub too much lipstick off. Finally, my brain came back with an appropriate response to her compliments. I pulled together my insecurities and mashed them down before looking her right in her baby browns. “You are work the risk.”

“Wow.” The blond blushed, the heat rising from her lowcut jacket to the roots of her frosted hair. “You don’t fool around when you give out pretty words.”

“I’m not kidding.”

She reached a hand across the table. “I know.”

“Even if this,” I squeeze her hand, “doesn’t go anywhere. Thank you for reminding me, making me see, I can go after my dreams again.”

She squeezed back.

I think we both lost track of time, certainly of the room, because the next thing I heard was the waitress clearing her throat. We looked over to find her and her twin there with our main entrees. We dropped our hands and pulled them back, leaving the table clear for the food. Her split-serving of the Essau soup gave off a rich meaty smell; my salt-and-pepper steaks-and-eggplant pairing, half-sized with the other half to take home packed away in the back, sizzled on the metal platter.

(words 2,140; first published 1/29/2023)

Geeking Science: String Cheese

Acquired from Wikipedia Article

Bobbing along editing and an author refers to string cheese, in a fantasy with all the normal medieval and renaissance mish-mash. Wait … is string cheese medieval?

Off to do research, and the answer is “no”. In 1976, Wisconsin cheese-maker Frank Baker decide to see if he could make the normal stretchy-stringy mozzarella properties even more-so to create a light snack people can take with them for lunch. Through a heating and manipulation process to align the proteins, strings of cheese resulted.

The small individually packed cheese product caught on in the 80’s as a child novelty lunch-snack. In the 90’s the Adkin and similar low-carb diets kicked it higher. Now, for the Baker family, string cheese is their only product.

Bibliography
Channel 3000 (youtube channel) “What Makes String Cheese Stringy?” 2009 November 10. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sl2den0QVrA – last viewed 5/1/2022.

Dairy foods (youtube channel). “What makes Baker Cheese’s string cheese production unique.” 2020 March 19. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bqFvsNA2GJY – last viewed 5/1/2022.

Higgins, Daniel. “Baker Cheese masters art of string cheese”. Green Bay Press Gazette / USA TODAY NETWORK-Wisconsin. 2017 June 6. https://www.greenbaypressgazette.com/story/life/food/2017/06/06/wisconsin-cheesemaker-baker-cheese-masters-the-art-of-string-cheese/96198296/ – last viewed 5/1/2022.

Wikipedia. “String cheese.” https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/String_cheese – last viewed 5/1/2022.